Unprepared.

Last night I realised that it feels horrible to be unprepared. In this case; when I packed my suitcases for this trip to Adelaide, I packed for a short visit. The only reason we came was to see my family & meet my gorgeous new nephew!❤❤

But now, my trip may last longer. I want to spend some quality time with my beautiful mum. Especially as she is feeling unwell & needs to be ‘loved on’ a little bit extra. Especially as she may be facing another battle to fight off this cancer. Especially as she is crying out for a miracle!

The horrible thing is that I’m unprepared!

I wasn’t expecting to stay in Adelaide for more than 2 weeks. So I’m not ready! Do I have enough clothes? I didn’t pack my cloth nappies or many baby clothes! Do I have enough clothes for my 3 year old?

Of course, none of these things matter. In Adelaide, we have op shops! My husband can bring nappies for me. I will be fine!

The discomfort I feel isn’t just from thinking about being physically ready. I’m not even emotionally ready! I miss my Alice Springs home! I miss my husband! I miss the comfort of my routine and my bedroom and my own home!

I’m not prepared emotionally for this season of being out of place. Out of my “normal”.

But God isn’t suprised. God knows everything we are about to face.

After recognizing that I really don’t like this feeling of being unprepared- I suddenly thought about being prepared spiritually.

How many people will have an overwhelmingly scary feeling of being unprepared on judgement day? How many people will realise with horror that they aren’t ready for eternity? That they haven’t asked God into their hearts and turned away from their sins?

Once that day comes, you can’t turn back! Time will be up! And like my sinking feeling that I can’t go home to collect my things and get ready- we will no longer be able to get ready for the lover of our souls. Our righteous judge.

“But the day of the Lord will come as unexpectedly as a thief. Then the heavens will pass away with a terrible noise, and the very elements themselves will disappear in fire, and the earth and everything on it will be found to deserve judgment.” 2 Peter 3:10 NLT

I want to be prepared! I already love Jesus! I already desperately know that I need God’s grace and forgiveness everyday. I have the peace of the assurance of my salvation. I’m so thankful. I’d be lost without my saviour!

But am I fully prepared?

Have I loved God with everything in me? Have I given Him my time and my affection?

Do I know Him as much as I can while on this Earth?

It’s hard to admit, but my headt cries out: “I’m not ready! I’m not fully prepared!”. Like my trip: I’d be “ok”. I know I’ve been redeemed and set free for my sins. Jesus has paid the ultimate price for my forgiveness….I’d be “ok” as far as salvation…

But I wouldn’t feel like I’d given Him enough. Enough of my time. Enough of my focus. Enough of my devotion. He is worthy of everything that I have to pour out in worship!

If I knew that my time was running out- I’d be less complacent. I’d spend longer reading the Bible. I would be in constant communion and communication with God, through prayer. I would probably pray and fast more and intercede for those who haven’t met Jesus yet! My conversations with others would be more purposeful. I would pursue my Jesus with every moment and with all of my heart, soul and mind and strength!

I want to be prepared. I want to run my race well.

Now is our time to get ready. Time is running out. Tomorrow is not promised. Seek God. Be prepared!❤

Love always Kelly xx

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